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The Death Star was a fearsome battle station in the Star Wars saga - but purely fictional.
The White House says building a Death Star would be an out-of-this-galaxy waste of money — not only because it's against government policy to blow up planets, but also because the United States already has access to a space station as well as a laser-wielding space robot.
Today's official statement on the Death Star issue, titled "This Isn't the Petition Response You're Looking For," was written by Paul Shawcross, chief of the science and space branch at the White House Office of Management and Budget. It comes in response to a "We the People" petition that called on the federal government to start building a "Star Wars"-style Death Star battle station by 2016.
"By focusing our defense resources into a space-superiority platform and weapon system such as a Death Star, the government can spur job creation in the fields of construction, engineering, space exploration, and more, and strengthen our national defense," the petition read.
The petition garnered more than 25,000 online signatures within a month, partly due to a signing campaign that went viral on 4chan, Reddit and Twitter. Under the Obama administration's rules for the "We the People" program, that required the White House to come up with a reply.
Shawcross and his colleagues clearly rose to the challenge, with an essay that should satisfy the policy geeks as well as the "Star Wars" geeks. Here's the full text:
This Isn't the Petition Response You're Looking For
"The Administration shares your desire for job creation and a strong national defense, but a Death Star isn't on the horizon. Here are a few reasons:
- The construction of the Death Star has been estimated to cost more than $850,000,000,000,000,000. We're working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.
- The Administration does not support blowing up planets.
- Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?
"However, look carefully (here's how) and you'll notice something already floating in the sky — that's no Moon, it's a Space Station! Yes, we already have a giant, football field-sized International Space Station in orbit around the Earth that's helping us learn how humans can live and thrive in space for long durations. The Space Station has six astronauts — American, Russian, and Canadian — living in it right now, conducting research, learning how to live and work in space over long periods of time, routinely welcoming visiting spacecraft and repairing onboard garbage mashers, etc. We've also got two robot science labs — one wielding a laser — roving around Mars, looking at whether life ever existed on the Red Planet.
"Keep in mind, space is no longer just government-only. Private American companies, through NASA's Commercial Crew and Cargo Program Office (C3PO), are ferrying cargo — and soon, crew — to space for NASA, and are pursuing human missions to the Moon this decade.
"Even though the United States doesn't have anything that can do the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs, we've got two spacecraft leaving the Solar System and we're building a probe that will fly to the exterior layers of the Sun. We are discovering hundreds of new planets in other star systems and building a much more powerful successor to the Hubble Space Telescope that will see back to the early days of the universe.
"We don't have a Death Star, but we do have floating robot assistants on the Space Station, a President who knows his way around a light saber and advanced (marshmallow) cannon, and the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency, which is supporting research on building Luke's arm, floating droids, and quadruped walkers.
"We are living in the future! Enjoy it. Or better yet, help build it by pursuing a career in a science, technology, engineering or math-related field. The President has held the first-ever White House science fairs and Astronomy Night on the South Lawn because he knows these domains are critical to our country's future, and to ensuring the United States continues leading the world in doing big things.
"If you do pursue a career in a science, technology, engineering or math-related field, the Force will be with us! Remember, the Death Star's power to destroy a planet, or even a whole star system, is insignificant next to the power of the Force."
Update for 9:35 p.m. ET Jan. 11: The White House statement quickly sparked a Twitter response from Darth Vader himself: "A serious mistake, Mr. President. You can never have enough planet-sized lasers."
Update for 1:40 a.m. ET Jan. 12: NASA may brag about the space station and its laser-equipped Curiosity rover, but that's not enough, Death Star PR says in a Twitter update: "Until you put the laser and the space station together and start blowing up planets, you're not doing enough Science."
Other spaced-out petitions:
- White House: No E.T. visits, no UFO cover-up
- Petition calls for development of nuclear rocket
- White House urged to build Starship Enterprise
Alan Boyle is NBCNews.com's science editor. Connect with the Cosmic Log community by "liking" the log's Facebook page, following @b0yle on Twitter and adding the Cosmic Log page to your Google+ presence. To keep up with Cosmic Log as well as NBCNews.com's other stories about science and space, sign up for the Tech & Science newsletter, delivered to your email in-box every weekday. You can also check out "The Case for Pluto," my book about the controversial dwarf planet and the search for new worlds.
Leave a Comment:
Jezzz people, the petitioners should learn how to walk before they try to run. The should have asked for one of those cool anti gravity motorcycles, that would be fun.... :-)
No need to.
Darth Vader is already President.
Is this the first Defense Bill that both the Democrats and the Republicans agree on? Miracle!
How about a jobs program for the good ole USA infastructure that's falling apart? Hello
Their is already a petition on that subject.
OK, their are other Petitions with more than 25,000 signitures; several with over a 100,000 that the the white house hasn't answered or responded to, WHY?
Probably because they're not as stupid as this one.
Obama's going to have his death squads working overtime with the new ACA as it is. He doesn't have time to destroy the universe - Yet!
Your paranoia is showing. There are no death squads. There are, at this time, hospice programs that mercifully allow people to die because keeping them breathing is only drawing out their deaths. I do hospice care and I can assure you that I want them to let me go when hope is gone and keeping me alive is only prolonging my death. Hospice programs have existed for many years. Insurance companies have long refused treatment for people and sentenced them to die by denying them treatments that might have saved their lives. If insurance companies can conspire to kill you, how is Obamacare, which at least gives you choices, any worse?
No death squads. Just drones and secret hit lists.
That's insane.
Just the petition alone is insane.
Let's apply money towards more constructive purposes. Cancer research anyone? They say "The cure is around the corner" but cancer research has been saying that for years.
A death star is insane. It would restart the arms war and then we would really be bankrupt. But we may need a space program just to find a habitable planet when we finish destroying this one. I hope everyone realizes that only the one percenters would actually be allowed to go. The rest of us will be left here to die.
Obama administration is short sighted just like all the Reagan nay-sayers. Remember the derision he faced in the media and from the Democrats on 'Star Wars'? Obama admin has the limited vision of the future taught in our education system. He says 'hope' but he means stop innovation, everyone move to apartments in the city, dump your vehicles and get on the train/bus, and let us feed and clothe you. We know best. Sad.
There are Habital planets out there we know it, it's just getting there will take time. We have the technology to do it, I'm sure SpaceX can design one that will transport astronauts to a planet orbit it for awhile then land on the planet and see whats in store.
LOL...these people can't produce a budget more less a model kit of a space station.
"We're working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it." What a bunch of liars!!!
Very entertaining response from the WH on a comical subject. There are obviously creative and intelligent people employed by this administration. Now maybe all of these MENSA members can respond to some serious issues with practical solutions.
Or would that be too much like work?
My brain hurts already!!
Just buy a Delorean time machine, go into the future and bring one back with you. The time machines are sold on Ebay.
Death Stars exist, they are called Cosmospheres which are huge high orbit, charger particle beam weapons systems. The Russians have them, we dont. These weapons have been used on us starting in at least the 1970`s. They bought the tech from Tesla. Have you heard of spontaneous human combustion? That is someone targeted from orbit. Remember the so called sonic booms, which were heard off the east coast of the U.S. in late 1977 and early 1978? Those were beams sent down into low atmosphere in difused mode to warn the U.S. gov. Oklahoma City explosion? That was NOT a van bomb. It was a Russian weapon.We currently have no defense against them.
Grab your tinfoil hat, your psychosis is showing.
You must have forgotten to take your meds today.
hahahahahahahahahah OMG Andy I thought I had seen some people with delusions but you just blew them all away. LMAO
Screw Star Wars. Beam me up!
Ever seen "Galaxy Quest?"
You first.
;-)
No Death Star???
Lord Cheney will definitely not... be... pleased.
After all, it's much less impressive to attempt to dominate from an "undisclosed location." It just doesn't sound ominous enough. No panache.
Well, I'm not gonna be the one to tell him!
Get one of the "red shirt" guys from Star Trek to do it. They're just phaser fodder anyway.
As long as we can still build a dozen or so Corellian battlecruisers we should be safe form those Hoka an Ewok invaders.
well done!!!! stop wasting our money on stupid ideas!!!! what we need is job creation!!!!!!!!
Well done? You mean you actually thought there was a possibility that the WH could have, would have issued an order for a death star and you are patting them on the back for a job well done (with four exclamation points) for saying no to a ridiculous petition?
Gene Roddenberry would never have been so stupid as to require his staff to respond to this illogical petition! Captain Kirk for president!
It could be I'm in a bad mood. After reading all these comments I'm struck with the idea that some people hate anything that comes out of Washington D.C., Good,bad and indifferent. Funny,not funny. Secretly I think these same people are thankful that they have a government that does'nt stop them from airing their views by visiting them in the middle of the night. Like I said, it could be I'm in a bad mood.
The primary reason the Obama Administration cannot and will not permit any space program to be contemplated within his tenure is that, as Mr. Obama sadly conceded (albeit attempting to cede the current US status) that 'Like it or not the United States is still a world power.' Mr. Obama was incorrect in describing the US as a mere member in the class of world powers, the United States is well above mere world power status and remains the Super Power. Additionally, Mr. Obama in official distain for the United States' unfair advantage over his Muslim brethren issued his infamous Presidential Order requiring that all of NASA's remaining resources be immediately redirected from nasty science issues to improving International Muslim self esteem. We must no longer lead the world, but rather stand side by side with third world dictators who dislike technology such as Indonesia,
Take an exlax and call a psychiatrist in the morning.
The sheer number of morons in this country is amazing. You know, there is a country that already exists that is perfect for people like you. It's called Iran and its that way ----->
Please go. You're ruining the national IQ.
This petition was actually a feeler put out by the defense contractors. Since Obama is closing down the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan they need a new way to suck money from the taxpayers.
Really? And the best strategy and hope for future contracts they could come up with is a death star? And the WH actually has the power to order one up if they so choose to?
I wish the WH would forget responding to it's pointless petition site and focus on running the country. Can anyone seriously consider this newsworthy?
IXLR8 - wow man really? you think this got 25k signatures cause people actually thought this would happen? Who needs the education here exactly?
Well, at least the pres doesn't have a stick stuck up his butt. Much better then a GOPTP pres would be. After all, they only smile when a working American votes to cut their own throat.
Wow, Mike...did you think all that up by yourself? Where did you find the time for all the research?